In the age of social media, people often crib about its overuse and negative aspects. However, I find a few positive pages that help me grow and learn. These pages spread the necessary messages and create awareness. Some of the influencers speak about the lesser discussed topics like breast cancer, menopause, depression and many other such things. While some other pages and handles give you some home remedy tips, parenting tips, relationship advice and all that. Today, I came across one such page which inspired me to write this article. It’s about how to raise happy, confident, and emotionally healthy children.
You can make or break your children’s confidence
Read these statements;
“I know you would fail.”
“Stop crying like a girl.”
“You will never succeed if you act like this.”
“This is such a stupid idea.”
What is common in the above statements? All these statements focus only on the negative aspects without giving any constructive guidance. I am sure most of us have heard, parents using these phrases for their children. What kind of impact do you think it will leave on your child? They will feel unloved; they will lose their confidence and consider themselves inadequate.
Now, check out these statements;
“Okay, it did not go as planned; next time we will find ways to improve it.”
“Crying won’t solve this, let’s find a solution,”
“It’s okay to fail; the important thing is that we must not stop trying.”
“This is a good idea but I believe you can come up with some better ones.”
These lines convey the same message but the sentiments are so different. It will encourage the child to do more. It will make your child confident.
A Happy Child is A Healthy Child
As parents, we sometime overlook a few things which can unintentionally create an unwanted situation in our home. There are few things which we need to keep in mind, if we want to raise a happy and confident child. We often say that children are our future. If it is so, then we need to make them really happy and strong. Here are a few simple yet important things that will make our kids emotionally strong and secure.
- Appreciate your children, even if it’s a small thing or a smallest achievement. Your simple appreciation means a lot to them.
- Never compare your kids with anyone, not even with their siblings.
- Never discourage your child, while he/she is struggling hard to get something right.
- Tell them how much you love them and how much you trust them.
- Never make fun of your child in front of others. Believe me; nothing can hurt any kid more than this. Social embarrassment is harsh. You never know what kind of impact you’re leaving on your child.
- No body-shaming! Never ever comment on your kid’s body, you are the one who is really responsible for their body shape, be it genetic or lifestyle.
You never know what they might be going through in their school or college or anywhere else. The least which they can expect from you is some good comments, some appreciation, some love and some affection. I’m not saying by following all these things you’ll become a perfect father or mother but yes, by remembering these ones you will surely make a positive impact in your child’s life.
Before Being A Good Parent; Become A Good Partner
Many people don’t understand this basic rule. How you treat your partner becomes the basic behavior foundation of your child. Kids mostly learn from what they see rather from what they are told. So, your family atmosphere needs to be good enough for the kid. Don’t preach something to your child, that you don’t practice. It will not work.
Another common mistake, that most parents do is, they want to be the “favorite parent” of their child. When one of the parents tries to discipline their kids that he/she is not supposed to do something; suddenly the other parent starts defending the kid. This might get you some scoring points in the eyes of the child, in compare to your spouse however you should remember that parenting is not a competition between you and your spouse! Please, don’t do such things. Never ever openly disagree or interrupt when one of the parents are disciplining their kids. If you disagree on something you both can discuss this later, privately. But in front of the kid, you both need to have a common voice. Otherwise, it can have adverse effects.
- The child may become confused. They will fail to understand what they supposed to do; what is right and what is wrong.
- The kid will get an encouragement for the wrong thing as he/she knows that the other parent is there to defend and protect.
Be Their Best Friend
Take time for your kids, spend time playing and talking with them. In this world of gadgets and screens, we often see how parents remain busy on their mobile, while their kid is playing alone. Children crave attention from their parents, even when they are speaking things as silly as the daily routine of their doll. You need to encourage them when they are telling you something. Listen to them and converse with them. It will not only make your bond stronger but also help the kid to develop a greater communication skill.
These days with the kind of things happening in our surrounding, it is very important to be their friend rather than a strict parent. Make sure you become their best friend with whom they can share everything without getting feared of anything. Now days, when one can access the whole world with their fingers; it is not possible to prevent the negative influences from reaching your child. However, you can surely create an environment where your kid feel safe enough to tell you about anything much before being wrongly influenced by anyone else. That’s all for now, apart from it keep smiling and make your kids smile.